Blog Posts

Speak your truth, set your boundaries, express your needs.

A couple of days ago a friend told me that it was okay to express disagreement and your needs even in front of those who seem to be amazing and you are terrified of losing. Dah bitch! -you may be thinking-What a wonderful realisation! I know this seems obvious however how do you assert that without being labelled as paranoid or obsessive? How do you actually know you aren’t being any of those things? Too good to be true Plenty

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Food shaming.

I have been food shamed today.  A woman commented on the size of my lunch at work to then explain her successful weight loss journey. I felt attacked and I was so ready to get defensive – I probably did a little bit-. I felt ashamed of eating my food and so the first thing I did was justifying the nutritious content of my lunch. But I noticed something else. I have been that woman plenty of times before. I

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The dating game.

I hate online dating. Actually, I hate dating. I find it extremely time consuming, heavily anxiety generating and highly unrewarding. Today, I was talking to one of my friends who shares the same thoughts. Why on earth do people like dating? How do they find it enjoyable? I could not understand that people will find joy in uncertainty.  Through the years I have seen patterns in the dating lives of me and most of my friends, and to be honest,

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Transformation: a fat girl’s tale

I have battled with my weight since I was 8 years old. Being a fat teenager wasn’t easy and at the age of 18 I was about 86kg. I hated myself. And I mean myself not just my body. But I hated that too. Forced into weight loss After trying dozens of diets from the age of 8 -which by the way, I would never recommend anyone to do- I developed a horrible relationship with food. There was bad food

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Right person, wrong time?

People say timing is everything. We have all heard that love is about finding the right person at the right time. Sometimes the person is perfect but the timing is wrong. Maybe this is the most hurtful “failure” of romantic relationships because it can leave us feeling empty, frustrated and confused. Why did life put them on my way if it wasn’t the right time? Why are they dating if they aren’t ready? Wait a minute, am I ready? Human

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The power of sex.

My mum said something very interesting today. She said that some men only have one way of submitting women that seem strong, confident and independent and that is having sex with them. She said that by having sex with women, some men feel that these strong women are now submissive and they have control over them. It seemed savage to me, was she really saying that some men view sex as a way of humiliating or at least dominating women?

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Resisting the urge: dating and OCD

A friend told me the other day that I had to slow down. I was telling her about my dating life, actually, about my last relationship failure -or lesson- and she said that projecting less and slowing down was under my control. I got quite anxious and upset and I could already feel I was getting defensive and I could start attacking her, so I closed the chat and messaged one of my best friends instead What on earth is

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Straight men don’t cross their legs.

It’s funny. I try to break stereotypes, using this blog among other channels, and then I find myself falling into every single one of of them when it comes to dating men. I met an amazing guy recently. Another potential one. He called my attention straight away and it was clear I was attracted to him however he wasn’t my type on paper. He was kind and gentle. He was polite and humble. He wasn’t cocky or pushy. Although he

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Too intense to date.

A close friend sent me a screenshot of a twitter post this morning. It was about a woman who was telling her experience of once being told by a boy that she was so smart he felt he couldn’t keep it up, with a sad face on. She believed he was doing this expecting her to turn herself down. Instead of doing so, she agreed, and fucked his friend. She believed that when a man tells a woman she is

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Fucking the now

Have you ever had sex with somebody and felt guilty afterwards? I have found myself feeling guilty after uncommitted sex consistently for the past 10 years of my life. The only times when I didn’t feel guilty was when the person I was having sex with was my partner, someone that was -supposedly- committed to me, or after having sex with someone that had the intention of engaging in some sort of longer-term relationship. However, when it ended up being

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